Man Handle Massage

[Rip Torn]

No, this is about the other kind of being man handled. So once upon a time I was at a mall in New York killing time and there is this massage place. They must have not been too busy because they were standing out front looking for business. This one guy grabs my traps and starts making bread out of them. So I says ok, let's go for an hour. All Asian dudes working at this place an my guy was particularly strong. So lay on the table, clothes on, (no hole for your face which as a little uncomfortable) and the guy proceeds to try and push me through the table for the next hour. For the happy ending he sits me up and proceeds to crack every bone in my spine from the base of my skull to my hips. Even the ones between my shoulder blades, it was loud so I don't think they've been cracked before. Good Lord, talk about having your eyes roll back.

Any of you guys ever encounter something like this in Edmonton?

 

[Rubmegood]

guy grabs my traps and starts making bread out of them

What the hell does that mean?? I'm a little slow when it comes to modern lingo- (I'm guessing its has to do with trapezoid muscles...)

 

[Rip Torn]

Yes sir, they are the trapezius muscles located on the neck going out to the shoulders. Then proceeded to knead them like bread dough. Likely the easiest to show your skills standing up outside your shop, prostate massage would have been weird in that situation.

 

[Owenglasses39]

No, this is about the other kind of being man handled. So once upon a time I was at a mall in New York killing time and there is this massage place. They must have not been too busy because they were standing out front looking for business. This one guy grabs my traps and starts making bread out of them. So I says ok, let's go for an hour. All Asian dudes working at this place an my guy was particularly strong. So lay on the table, clothes on, (no hole for your face which as a little uncomfortable) and the guy proceeds to try and push me through the table for the next hour. For the happy ending he sits me up and proceeds to crack every bone in my spine from the base of my skull to my hips. Even the ones between my shoulder blades, it was loud so I don't think they've been cracked before. Good Lord, talk about having your eyes roll back.

Any of you guys ever encounter something like this in Edmonton?

This was the funniest review/experience I've read on here in a long time. What a breath of fresh air. Thanks RipTorn