More Funny News Articles

[Bud]

cool :

 

[Sata]

Court Victory For Man With Ten-Year Erection Due To Malfunctioning Implant

The 68-year-old Rhode Island man says it's embarrassing, and it's led him to become a recluse.

Providence, RI -- Two years before Viagra hit the pharmacy shelves, Charles Lennon got a penile implant to overcome his impotence.

But he's regretted it ever since, because the steel and plastic device never worked right. While it was supposed to allow him to position his penis up for ***, then down the rest of the time, he's been unable to lower it.

Lennon's ten-year erection has now won him a $400,000 judgment against the company that made the implant.

The 68-year-old Rhode Island man says it's embarrassing, and it's led him to become a recluse. He's in pain and is uncomfortable being around his grandchildren. And because of other health problems he can't get the device removed.

The maker, which went bankrupt, declined comment.

Clerk Gets 6 Months for Urinating In Soda

(AP) DELAND, Fla. A former convenience store clerk who urinated in a bottle of soda that was later drunk by a customer was sentenced Thursday to six months in jail.

Anthony Mesa, 22, has already served half his sentence since pleading no contest to tampering with a consumer product, and will remain on a form of house arrest for two years after release. He had faced up to 30 years in jail.

Circuit Judge James R. Clayton withheld adjudication on the case, which means Mesa will not be considered a convicted felon if he abides by the sentence.

Mesa was working at a Pix store in Deltona in August when he and a co-worker decided to play practical jokes. They put eggs in beer cartons, and Mesa thought it would be funny to urinate into a drink, according to arrest reports.

He admitted urinating into a Mountain Dew and placing it back into the refrigerator, authorities said.

The victim, a foreman with a Daytona Beach construction company, became suspicious of the drink after he chugged it and vomited three or four times. He settled a civil complaint with the store for an undisclosed amount of money before a lawsuit was filed.

Gran hits burglar with garden gnome

A grandmother knocked out a burglar by hitting him with a garden gnome.

Jean Collop, 69, woke at 5am to find an intruder clambering on her roof.

She yelled at the man, then picked up a gnome and hurled it at him, reports The Sun.

It bounced off his head, leaving him lying dazed on the roof in Wadebridge, Cornwall.

Jean dashed to fetch her rolling pin and a camera, and then took photos of the burglar as neighbours called the police.

Officers arrived to find the man still on the roof and half a dozen locals standing guard.

Jean said: "I heard a crash and rushed out in my nightdress. I politely told him not to move and grabbed the first thing that came to hand, which was a garden gnome.

"When it hit him he lay down for a while. I got my rolling pin in case. I didn't want to break another gnome."