Windows

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The following are new Windows messages that are under
consideration for the planned updated Windows XP (Xtra Pants)


1) Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.

2) Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue.

3) Press any key to continue or any other key to quit.

4) Pressing Y or N will delete all files on your hard drive. Continue? (Y/N)

5) Press Ctrl-Alt-Del now for IQ test.

6) Close your eyes and press escape three times.

7) Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner!

8) This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play
another game?

9) Windows message: "Error saving file! Format drive now? (Y/Y)"

10) This is a message from God Gates: "Rebooting the world.
Please log off."

11) To "shut down" your system, type "WIN."

12) BREAKFAST.SYS halted... Cereal port not responding.

13) COFFEE.SYS missing... Insert cup in cup holder and press any
key.

14) CONGRESS.SYS corrupted... Re-boot Washington D.C? (Y/N)

15) File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)

16) Bad or missing mouse. Kick the cat? (Y/N)

17) Runtime Error 6D at 417A:32CF: Incompetent User.

18) Error reading FAT record: Try the SKINNY one? (Y/N)

19) WinErr 16547: LPT1 not found. Use backup. (PENCIL &
PAPER.SYS)

20) User Error: Replace user.

21) Windows VirusScan 1.0 report - "Windows 2000 found: Remove it? (Y/N)"

22) This program has performed an illegal operation and we know exactly where you live and all your bank details

23) If you are an artist, you should know that Bill Gates owns
you and all your future creations. Doesn't it feel nice to have
security?

24) Required Government Warning: Microsoft: After we got caught in cahoots with the hardware manufacturers for trying to needlessly fill
your hard drives, the following message is now required as you
save your files in Word:
"Word has detected that you don't wish to save your text file as
a lumpy and space wasting .doc format filled with potential
viruses. Would you like to save your old outdated ascii file as
a Word file anyway?"

25) Your hard drive has been scanned and all stolen software
titles have been detected. The police are on the way.